1) Teach your son (if you have one) to aim...and I'm not talking about an arrow. Teach him to get it into the toilet and then teach him to wipe it up if he misses. Pow! You're husband of the year.
2) Don't buy her the box of chocolates. If you are going to get her sweets/candy/morsels of sugary deliciousness it needs to be in conjunction (that means with) another gift. The ladies spend most of the year worrying about that extra five pounds. They don't need to add the stress of "if I don't eat ALL of the delicious candy then he'll think I don't like it" to their lives. We like the candy, we're thankful that you thought of us, but please, wallowing in a guilty stupor is probably not what you had in mind for the rest of Valentine's night. Do yourself a favor and use moderation with the sweets. This leads directly into number three
3) Don't buy her the gym membership. Unless your wife has been dropping hints the size of the a-bomb around your house, she will take it the wrong way which will in turn lead her to binge on the after Valentine's sales of those chocolates you didn't buy her. A correctly dropped hint would be,
"Honey/Darling/(insert name here) I want a gym membership to such and such a gym
more than anything else. Please buy it for me for Valentine's day.
If you do that, me love you long time"
Anything less than that, boys and you'll be risking your neck and your eternal happiness. Also, if she says she wants it from a particular gym, don't use this as an opportunity to wow her with your bargain shopping prowess. I promise you she knows exactly what gym she wants to work out and and why.
4) If you've got a reader as a spouse/girlfriend/special someone a gift card is the best. Why?
They are probably somewhat anal retentive about their "to-read" lists and just because you peeked in their journal or on their Shelfari to see what their "to-read" list said, I can guarantee they have a "to-buy" list and just because a book is on their "to-read" list, doesn't guarantee it's presence on the "to-buy" list. If you don't get it, you obviously aren't a reader.
They are probably somewhat anal retentive about their "to-read" lists and just because you peeked in their journal or on their Shelfari to see what their "to-read" list said, I can guarantee they have a "to-buy" list and just because a book is on their "to-read" list, doesn't guarantee it's presence on the "to-buy" list. If you don't get it, you obviously aren't a reader.
5) Not your average movie tickets. No, mister, go beyond just the movie tickets...plan the babysitter, get home from work early so your wife can shower ALONE and put her make up on in peace. Then...take her to the movies...there are some interesting ones out now....
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6.) So a massage might be a little cliche, but then again if you've ever had one, you'll know it is one of the best.gifts.ever.
7.) Allora Handmade is a favorite shop of mine to drool over; I just have to be careful not to get any drool on my computer. Just look at her lovely creations...
9) Do think in themes....
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10) If your significant other is a blogger then please, do buy her a ticket to Allume Social. It's happening this October and tickets go on sale in a mere sixteen days. Tick tock.
What would you add to this list? Any comical do's or don'ts?
